Sunday, October 21, 2012
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Endings...
The last few days have been super hectic. There was a lot happening at work; I was trying to finish reading the Odyssey for my mythology course; there were those Diwali gift boxes that I had pledged which I now needed to put together....in short I didn't know whether I was coming or going. To add to that, I have come down with a throat infection and fever and general exhaustion.
Tomorrow is my last day at TC. I joined them nearly 5 years ago and it has been an interesting stint. The last week has been full of deadlines and last minute stuff...spent today doing handovers...another round of handover tomorrow...and then time for goodbyes. Change is scary. Change is good.
Tomorrow is my last day at TC. I joined them nearly 5 years ago and it has been an interesting stint. The last week has been full of deadlines and last minute stuff...spent today doing handovers...another round of handover tomorrow...and then time for goodbyes. Change is scary. Change is good.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Why is it that the deeper the emotion, the harder it is to put into words? So much to say, and no way to express any of it.....Why is it that the things you wish to forget are the ones you just cannot get out of your head...Why is it that just when you think maybe you have figured things out, something comes up out of the blue and shatters that illusion, leaving you vulnerable again...What do you do when the words you utter seem to make no sense to others... and when your unanswered questions refuse to go away and leave you in peace...
Sunday, October 7, 2012
An old post revisited
I used to have a blog on rediff many years ago. This is something I posted on the blog on Independence Day nine years back. I had meant to share it here around 15th August this year but life got in the way. Anyway, this is what I wrote, in its unedited entirety. Some of it applies even today.
Well, how can I not mention it...Our Independence Day...It got me thinking.....what does it mean to me? When I was very young, it was simple - it meant a holiday. We'd go to school only for the flag-unfurling ceremony, sing the National Anthem, manage to squirm through a long and boring speech by a local dignitary, eat the sweets being distributed, and the rest of the day would be free. To spend playing with friends, or curl up with a book, or go watch a movie with the family. Soon I realised that there was more to it. It was the anniversary of the day our country had attained freedom from foreign rule after a long, hard struggle. It was a day to remember and thank all those countless known and unknown men and women who had made a million different kinds of sacrifices for this goal. Who had "given their tomorrows for our today".
Of course, soon I also learned about the horrors of the other event associated forever with our independence day....the partition. My dad's entire family was displaced in the event. My grandmother used to tell me about her own experiences, or those of people she knew, and I would listen fascinated. I found it hard to take. For a while in my preteens, Independence Day acquired two very different sides to it....However, I managed to come through it without lasting damage ( I think !!).
I'm a patriot through and through. And it's not just because I'm an Army man's daughter. Hearing the National anthem being played gives me goosebumps and leaves me misty-eyed. I can't explain how hurt I felt when I attended a show of this movie where the Anthem was played, and I was among only a dozen odd people standing....the others remained seated....how can people do this to their own National Anthem?? Why feel ashamed to pay respect to your country? Have you ever seen children, the way they sing the Anthem with all their hearts and at the top of their voices? What changes as people grow older? Why can't adults do the same? I feel very strongly about this and I'm sure I'm not alone.
Yes, I feel strongly about my country, the Anthem, the flag. I feel proud to know that we're one of the world's most ancient cultures, I take pride in telling people about the degree of advancement and sophistication achieved by our ancient civilisations. I feel great when an Indian gets talked about for achievements in any field - be it academics, research, writing, arts, films, sports, business, anything. And yes, I'm the type to paint my face with the tricolour and take a flag and go cheer the Indian team when they're playing ( and it need not be only cricket).
But being patriotic is much more than that. It means not just talking about your country's past achievements but also doing your bit for its present. It means caring where your country is going, and trying to make a difference. It means not just pointing out its faults ( I know there are a lot of those) but having the guts to try and do something about it for a change. It means not hiding behind excuses ( "Nothing can be done for this country", "One person can't change anything" etc etc) and instead, to have the courage to stand up and be counted. And not to let the pessimists, the hecklers, the anarchists, stop you.
To those of you who regularly lament, "It's the system that's rotten!!" I ask this: what is the system? Is it not something created by us? Who propagates it and strengthens it day by day? We do. If we are capable of this, we are also capable of changing it.
Begin with the small things. Don't give or take bribes. It's become a habit , I know. Don't let anyone turn a sacred relationship like marriage into a commercial transaction, by giving or asking for dowry. Instead of expecting the government to do everything, take the initiative and do something on your own for a change. Don't litter - learn the use of dustbins. Even if it means walking a couple of extra yards in the market in search of one. Start practising water-conservation techniques - I do it and believe me it's worth it. Stop running down your country at every opportunity. Make friends with your neighbours. Give up your seat on the bus/train to the aged lady you see standing ahead. Teach your kids the importance of being honest, being polite even to strangers, protecting our environment, conserving our resources - and let it be through example.
Yes, life is hard. Yes, it's tough enough to just get through the daily struggle for existence. But don't let all that kill our spirit, our optimism, our sense of humour, our humanity....
I'm putting into words today, something I've felt very strongly about for a long time, as my long-suffering friends will tell you :) This is not an intention to sermonise....
Well, how can I not mention it...Our Independence Day...It got me thinking.....what does it mean to me? When I was very young, it was simple - it meant a holiday. We'd go to school only for the flag-unfurling ceremony, sing the National Anthem, manage to squirm through a long and boring speech by a local dignitary, eat the sweets being distributed, and the rest of the day would be free. To spend playing with friends, or curl up with a book, or go watch a movie with the family. Soon I realised that there was more to it. It was the anniversary of the day our country had attained freedom from foreign rule after a long, hard struggle. It was a day to remember and thank all those countless known and unknown men and women who had made a million different kinds of sacrifices for this goal. Who had "given their tomorrows for our today".
Of course, soon I also learned about the horrors of the other event associated forever with our independence day....the partition. My dad's entire family was displaced in the event. My grandmother used to tell me about her own experiences, or those of people she knew, and I would listen fascinated. I found it hard to take. For a while in my preteens, Independence Day acquired two very different sides to it....However, I managed to come through it without lasting damage ( I think !!).
I'm a patriot through and through. And it's not just because I'm an Army man's daughter. Hearing the National anthem being played gives me goosebumps and leaves me misty-eyed. I can't explain how hurt I felt when I attended a show of this movie where the Anthem was played, and I was among only a dozen odd people standing....the others remained seated....how can people do this to their own National Anthem?? Why feel ashamed to pay respect to your country? Have you ever seen children, the way they sing the Anthem with all their hearts and at the top of their voices? What changes as people grow older? Why can't adults do the same? I feel very strongly about this and I'm sure I'm not alone.
Yes, I feel strongly about my country, the Anthem, the flag. I feel proud to know that we're one of the world's most ancient cultures, I take pride in telling people about the degree of advancement and sophistication achieved by our ancient civilisations. I feel great when an Indian gets talked about for achievements in any field - be it academics, research, writing, arts, films, sports, business, anything. And yes, I'm the type to paint my face with the tricolour and take a flag and go cheer the Indian team when they're playing ( and it need not be only cricket).
But being patriotic is much more than that. It means not just talking about your country's past achievements but also doing your bit for its present. It means caring where your country is going, and trying to make a difference. It means not just pointing out its faults ( I know there are a lot of those) but having the guts to try and do something about it for a change. It means not hiding behind excuses ( "Nothing can be done for this country", "One person can't change anything" etc etc) and instead, to have the courage to stand up and be counted. And not to let the pessimists, the hecklers, the anarchists, stop you.
To those of you who regularly lament, "It's the system that's rotten!!" I ask this: what is the system? Is it not something created by us? Who propagates it and strengthens it day by day? We do. If we are capable of this, we are also capable of changing it.
Begin with the small things. Don't give or take bribes. It's become a habit , I know. Don't let anyone turn a sacred relationship like marriage into a commercial transaction, by giving or asking for dowry. Instead of expecting the government to do everything, take the initiative and do something on your own for a change. Don't litter - learn the use of dustbins. Even if it means walking a couple of extra yards in the market in search of one. Start practising water-conservation techniques - I do it and believe me it's worth it. Stop running down your country at every opportunity. Make friends with your neighbours. Give up your seat on the bus/train to the aged lady you see standing ahead. Teach your kids the importance of being honest, being polite even to strangers, protecting our environment, conserving our resources - and let it be through example.
Yes, life is hard. Yes, it's tough enough to just get through the daily struggle for existence. But don't let all that kill our spirit, our optimism, our sense of humour, our humanity....
I'm putting into words today, something I've felt very strongly about for a long time, as my long-suffering friends will tell you :) This is not an intention to sermonise....
Saturday, October 6, 2012
The countdown starts...
Some of my colleagues who won't be around next week decided to give me an impromptu farewell party last night. An unexpected and very touching gesture, complete with a beautiful gift - a Ganesh statue to bring me luck.
Amidst the fun and laughter and all that beer (really, a whole lot of beer), I found myself facing the first stirrings of the old bitter-sweet feeling. It's been nearly five years here; most of that time has been good and I have made some good friends. Have learnt so much, grown so much. Moving on, although something I chose for myself, is bringing on a touch of sadness as well. I guess it's natural though. It's been quite a year already....All changes inevitably bring along a jumble of emotions and questions. Moving out of one's comfort zone, taking a leap into the unknown, can be scary. But I know I'm up for it. It's time.
Amidst the fun and laughter and all that beer (really, a whole lot of beer), I found myself facing the first stirrings of the old bitter-sweet feeling. It's been nearly five years here; most of that time has been good and I have made some good friends. Have learnt so much, grown so much. Moving on, although something I chose for myself, is bringing on a touch of sadness as well. I guess it's natural though. It's been quite a year already....All changes inevitably bring along a jumble of emotions and questions. Moving out of one's comfort zone, taking a leap into the unknown, can be scary. But I know I'm up for it. It's time.
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